"Hey, this is Matt. I'm not here, so do the message thing. Yeah, after the beep."


[Messages for Matt or his writer can be left here]

[Follows THIS]

The house was a pretty quiet place at the moment, the only other occupants being Jason and Taylor in their bedroom, and considering it was pretty much silent and dark in that part of the house, Matt had just assumed they were sleeping and he had been trying to stay quiet because of it. He even took the kettle through into the laundry at the back of the house to boil it so the noise wouldn't disturb them, and now he was back, sitting at the kitchen table with his hand wrapped around a large mug of coffee as he slowly glanced over the handful of brochures spread out in front of him. To one side he had information on the hospital and the nursing courses at UT, given to him by the woman who had offered him a job. She told him to take a few days to think about it, but before leaving the hospital to come home when it looked like Sam wasn't coming out of Tim's room any time soon, he stopped by her office and accepted the offer. At the end of the day, he needed the money, and it was going to be good money. Plus, it would be the first step to him becoming a qualified nurse, a career he had fleetingly considered in the past when it seemed like his art just wasn't going to earn him a living.

( Next to those brochures were information sheets on epilepsy that he had been reading to try and get an understanding of it... )


Word Count | 2,328

LINK: After watching Silas across the hospital waiting room wrestle with his cell, with a small sigh, Matt pulled Google up on his own phone and went over to silently hand it to the frustrated weed dealer... anything to ease the tension lingering in the room.

[Follows THIS]

Matt was buried under the mound of covers in the bed, curled up in a ball on his side with his arm wrapped protectively around his stomach. He really was trying to sleep, but every time he got close, his stomach cramped up again and his brain seemed to want to kick into overdrive. He was trying not to think about Sam out there talking to Riggins. As far as Matt was concerned, no good could come of it. Sam had been too hung up on Riggins, and she wasn't going to want someone like Matt if Riggins was there for the taking. In fact, if he wasn't feeling so crap, Matt was sure he would have gotten into his crappy car by now and just left. Maybe even gone back to Dillon, who knew? No one expected everything to blow up for Jason and Mac's wedding, but it had, and they all seemed to have some pieces to pick up in the wake of it. Matt couldn't believe how stupid Riggins had been getting caught up in crime shit like that. If criminals were Sam's type, Matt was going to be well out of the picture. He couldn't even lie to someone without getting a heavy guilt complex plaguing him.

He didn't know whether it was just because it was so soon after his break up with Julie. He had felt ready to move on, but he definitely didn't feel ready to be hurt again. Being hurt sucked. He had only had two relationships with girls in his life, and both had kicked him in the gut on some level. He thought Sam might be different, but that was when Riggins wasn't in the picture. A shiver crept over his body, the old worn Panthers t-shirt and track pants he used as pyjamas not doing much, and he huddle further under the covers, closing his eyes. He pushed all the thoughts of out his mind and tried to sleep again. He was so tired, he felt like he could sleep for a week.

( Sam still felt like a weight had been lifted after her awkward conversation with T... )


Word Count | 3,743

LINK: Matt wasn't sure he had the energy, stamina, strength or mojo to compete with a Riggins and wondered if he should just cut his losses before he made a dick of himself.


[Follows THIS]

LINK: He still wasn't completely sure if it was a good idea, but he knew he wanted it enough to at least give it a go and know there wasn't a lot he could really lose anymore.



[Follows THIS]

[Contains spoilers for Friday Night Lights Season 4, especially in relation to Matt's exit]

Leaving Dillon.

It should have been an easy decision to make, but Matt learned long ago no decision he was faced with was ever easy. His life was meant to be hard. Maybe this was the first time since he could remember that it really just wasn't difficult? Leaving high school, finishing his semi-successful run with the Panthers which at least saw him win a State Championship, once it was all over and he gave up his chance of doing art at college to take care of his grandma so she didn't have to go into a home, there seemed to be little to nothing. He ended up delivering pizzas, and he had Julie. Julie was a shining light in his otherwise dreary post-high school life. He had convinced himself he could be satisfied in Dillon because he had to be. There wasn't any other option, if he didn't stay, Grandma went to a home and Matt just couldn't live with that.

And then the news came. His father was dead. Killed in Iraq. Matt's greatest fear, even if he harboured deep-seated confusion and hatred over the situation. But it was over with now, and Matt needed a clean slate. An insurance payout meant his Grandma and his Mom would be fine without him. If he stayed in Dillon any longer, it would kill him. He loved Julie, and a part of him probably always would, but it was over now. She was part of that portion of his life that came with nothing but pain and loss. Strangely enough, it had been Tim Riggins who had come through when he most needed it. Matt found a support in his ex-teammate that he would never have anticipated could have been there. At the end of the day, Matt didn't really know exactly what it was that helped him make the decision to walk away from Dillon. He just knew he had to.

( One last favour, though... )

"If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it."

LINK: The accident was horrific, but he would never be thankful enough for having Jason Street coach him and show him that passion was only the beginning.

2.7. "In order for people to be happy, sometimes they have to take risks. It's true these risks can put them in danger of being hurt."
- Meg Cabot

Co-written with wannabeimprtant | Follows THIS

Tyra had stood there awkwardly after Matt's timely exit. She'd caught Landry's eye briefly, and for a moment she considered going over and talking to him. Hanging around Dillon had been mostly a good idea. Until that kiss with Matt. The kiss that was keeping her awake most of the night, and the one that had her smiling a little too fondly when she should have been feeling guilty. And for the most part she did. Especially now as she looked at Landry sitting there alone. She opened her mouth like she wanted to say hello, but shut it quickly and turned and left.

It wasn't a wise move, but then she had never professed to know what she was doing half the time. She went with her gut unless she was definitely required to think something through. Like college. She would talk to Landry another night. Maybe even try and call him later. Right now she had something else to fix. Matt's tail lights were already disappearing in the distance, and Tyra was happy to let him get the head start. Gave her a little more time to try and get her brain and gut to agree. Or just let her gut win out since the decision was already made.

( A short time later she was pulled up out the front of the Saracen's, and biting the corner of her lip... )

No binding on any Landry muses


Word Count | 1,880

1.8. "Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose."
- From the television show 'The Wonder Years'

Grandma burnt the toast again this mornin'.

I'm not sure what we'd do if we didn't have smoke alarms. I can't tell her not to cook, though. She just gets more confused when things aren't how they're supposed to be. I know she can't really do what she used to, but she's happy when she tries. She's doesn't really realise she's makin' mistakes or nearly hurtin' herself. It's just Grandma, really. I know a lot of people think she's weird or they feel sorry for me for takin' care of her, but I wouldn't have anyone else without her. I kinda just do it. It's not really a burden most days.

I mean, yeah... it can be, I guess. Some days I just wish I was like all the other people at school with Mom and Dad home, and Grandma not thinkin' the pot plant was a kitten. Like Julie. She's got her Mom and Dad who love her and a kid sister who's probably gonna grow up thinkin' she's great. But some days she doesn't seem to realise how lucky she is. I miss my Mom and Dad, even if I hate them some days for leavin' me alone.

I love Grandma, but she's just ill and does strange things a lot. Sometimes she thinks I'm Grandpa. I just let her think that. I read a lot about Alzheimer's when the doctor first time me that's what Grandma might have. The books and stuff say that they don't remember the recent memories sometimes and get confused when ya' try and change stuff to things they don't know. I don't mind goin' into Grandma's world sometimes if it stops her bein' upset, ya' know? I don't like when she's upset. I feel like I'm failin' her and can't help her like I should be. If I don't take care of her, who will? She looked after me all those years and she's the only person who hasn't left me.

But I ain't a freak. I want to be normal some days, too. I want Grandma to be normal and not stuck in her old world. I'm goin' to really miss her when she goes back into it forever. Worst part is, I know it's gonna happen one day. One day soon, and it really hurts.


Word Count | 384